For a Pessimistic, I'm Pretty Optimistic
by angietet
Summary: Sequel to Private School, Secret Lovers. Nate and Mitchie are finally happy together. But where does that leave Shane? With Alex? And who is Shelby and what does she want with Nate? Rated M for Drug Abuse/Self Harm, Adult Themes and Language.
1. For a Pessimistic, I'm Pretty Optimistic

Here it is guys! The long awaited sequel to _**Private School, Secret Lovers**_!

* * *

Enjoy!

_**Nate's POV**_

"Ok. Our sales have increased at a rate of 4.5%. Keep this up guys, and your paychecks will do the same. Alright then, see you guys bright and early on Monday. Don't forget that we will have a July break party! Jake, I'm counting on you to bring your wife's cookies. Those are delicious!"

I reminded my employees.

"Sure thing boss!" Jake answered, excited. He, along with the other employees were content with their jobs here at Johnson&Johnson. We are one of the only companies that make so much that we get a summer break, as if we were in school. Of course, there will be some people working over the summer, but they are working overtime.

Chuckling, I exited the conference room, going to my office to finish up some last minute paperwork. Afterwards, I was going to meet up with Mitchie for the wedding plans. Yup. You heard right! Mitchie and I are getting married. After I got out of my coma four years ago, Mitchie and I decided to take our relationship slow. 5 months ago, I proposed to Mitchie on New Years Day; the perfect proposal. Now, it's June, and we're still drowned in wedding plans. The plans have also managed to cause many riffs in our relationship. All Mitchie ever talked about was wedding plans now, and truthfully, I don't give a fuck about it. The only good thing to look forward to is after the wedding, when it's all over with.

Before I turned off my computer to leave, I checked my e-mail once again. I had been checking it constantly to see if Shane had ever responded to his wedding invitation; which he hasn't. I hadn't seen him for about three years. After I got out of my coma, he was always around to help me, and our relationship grew until we were the best of friends. However, about a year later, he suddenly just left, leaving Mitchie an I a letter that stated that he just couldn't continue living a lie. That he was still in love with Mitchie, but his love for me, his family was greater; so he left. We hadn't heard from him since then, but I figured that he would at least come to the wedding; and it seems like I was wrong.

I locked my office door, and left the building, climbing into my Lexus '10 Hybrid. I had to meet Mitchie at the reception area, where we would meet the wedding party. Before going there, I stopped at the local bakery across the street to pick up some red velvet cupcakes for Mitchie, she loved them.

I walked into Annabelle's Sprinkles, and purchased a dozen cupcakes from Belle. She used to be my nurse at the hospital, but quit to pursue her passion for baking.

On the way out, I collided with a young lady that looked to be my age. We both hit the floor, the cupcakes flying out of my hand, and onto my shirt. The lady was immediately got up and started to apologize. She was wearing an employees vest, so I assumed that she worked here.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry! Damn it! This has been happening to me a lot." She profusely apologized, not meeting my eyes.

I peered at her name tag. "It's OK..._Shelby_. Don't worry about it." I looked at her for the first time, my breath catching in surprise. No, it wasn't because she was extremely attractive or ugly (which she wasn't, she was pretty), it was the fact that I felt like I was looking into a mirror. Shelby looked exactly like me! She had the same dark brown curls, except hers were much longer, brown eyes, and facial features as me. Shocked, I just looked at her.

For the first time during the whole encounter, she finally met my eyes. The surprise that registered in her eyes almost mirroring mine, except that hers was joyous, while mine was filled with confusion. She then gasped and jumped to hug me. "Nate! I'm so happy that I've finally met you!" She exclaimed, tears in her eyes.

What the hell? Who is this girl? "Um...sorry, but do I know you? I'm engaged by the way." I asked wearily, prying her off me. I mean, I get hit on a lot, but didn't she notice my engagement ring?

She stepped away, squealing. "Oh my god! Your getting married? I'm so excited, I've never been in a wedding!!" She jumped up and down, abruptly stopping. "Wait, you don't know who I am?"

_No, should I?_ "Uhh..your name tag says Shelby, but no, I don't know you. Maybe you have me mistaken for someone else."

Her joy filled eyes turned sad. "No, I _do_ know you. Your Nate Johnson."

Shocked, and a little freaked, I answered. "How do you know me?!"

"It's me, Shelby. Shelby Johnson. I've been searching for you for a while. I want to be in your life before it's too late. I'm your half-sister."

_What?_

_**Mitchie's POV**_

I'm sure that he's just stuck in traffic Mitchie. It _is_ rush hour." Caitlyn comforted me.

I glanced at my watch again. Nate was late, as usual. I looked out the window, and saw his car. What? Why was he at Annabelle's? I looked farther, towards the door, and saw Nate; and a girl, who was hugging him, too close. What the hell was going on?

I shot up from the table, startling Caitlyn, Jason, and the others around me.

"I'll be right back guys." I angrily said, stomping across the street.

I walked up to them; the girl was now crying, and Nate looked shocked. "What the hell is going on here?" I coldly asked.

None of them even acknowledged me, they were both still staring at each other.

"I _said,_ what the hell is going on here? Nate?"

When Nate finally looked at me, I saw shock present in his eyes. "Oh, Mitchie. What are you doing here?"

_What?! Is he really asking that? _"Well, I was waiting across for you across the street, with the rest of the _wedding_ party, for _our wedding_. Who is _she_?" I sneered.

His eyes narrowed for a second. "Hey, Mitch. Chill out. Why are you being a bitch?" His eyes then softened, as he pointed to the girl. "And her name is Shelby. She's says that she's my---." He paused.

Since Nate obviously wasn't going to tell me, I looked at her, my sharp eyes instantly softening, and my when I saw her tear stained face. Then, I gasped. She looked _exactly_ like-- Nate!

She then spoke up. "My name is Shelby Johnson. My father's name was Robert Johnson, and he had an affair with my mother, and dropped her when he found out that she was pregnant. He left her a hefty amount of money to never contact him again, which she didn't."

_Wait --- wasn't Nate's dad named Robert?_

Shelby continued. " Around Christmas last year, I went to the attic of my house to get the tree, and I noticed a box shoved behind it that I hadn't seen before. So, out of curiosity, I looked through it, and saw many photos of my father. Of course, I had seen him before, but in one of the pictures, there was a little boy with him. On the back of the picture was a note written by a lady named Denise, who I now know is Nate's mother. She wrote a note telling my mother that she was sorry for what Robert had done, and that she knew how my mother felt. That even though she was married to Robert, she still always felt like the other woman. That was when I found out that I had a brother. And a few months ago, I decided that I had to find him, before it was too late for me."

She paused, the tears rolling again. "I'm Nate's half-sister."

I looked at Nate, who's eyes were now hard. He took my hand, and started to drag me across the street. He looked back at her and said, "Stay away from me, and my family!"

_What the hell?_

**A/N: **_you guys know what to do! I need comments please!! ;D_


	2. When It Rains

**When It Rains**

**Rated M for Drug and Self abuse. Language.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anymore than I did the last time.**

_And when it rains  
Will you always find an escape?  
Just running away  
From all of the ones who love you  
From everything  
You made yourself a bed  
At the bottom of the blackest hole (blackest hole)  
And you'll sleep 'til May  
And you'll say that you don't want to see the sun anymore_

_-Paramore; When it Rains_

* * *

_**Shane's POV**_

Sighing, I slammed my laptop shut. Why did Nate continue to relentlessly push me into coming to the wedding. Is he serious? I'm just now accepting the fact that not only would Mitchie never be mine, but that she was my cousin's love. She would be there on family get togethers---with Nate.

I laid back on my couch, just staring off into space, something I did a lot lately. The door then opened, and one of my roommates, Greg James, walked in. He took one look at me and sighed.

"Dude. Is this seriously why you skipped practice today?" He angrily asked.

After leaving Texas, I crashed at Greg's place; he had been a buddy of mine back in Jersey. We had a small garage band back in the day, but nothing ever came out of that. Out of my misery, I began writing many songs, something I used to do a lot as a kid. One day, Greg found my stash of songs, and decided that we were going to resurrect our band. We got some more members, including the Justin Russo, who was also in our first garage band. Naming ourselves, Connect Three, we started playing at shows until we were finally signed onto Mercury Records. Long story short, I was now what you would call, "a rockstar."

I tried to play dumb. "Oh, we had practice today? I had no idea, sorry man."

"Stop shitting me. I called you two hours ago, and you said that you'd be on your way Shane."

_Oh yeah. Damn._ "Oh, uhh....I don't feel very well, you know? I didn't want it to spread." I lied.

Greg just sighed. "Sure. Just like last week, and the week before that. Shane, you've got to get over her. I've known you for years, even before Mitchie, and I miss my old best friend."

I sat up guiltily. I didn't want to hurt those around me, but I just couldn't help it. "I'm sorry man. You know what, let's all go out tonight. Tell the guys that we're going out to a local club, maybe play a small set?" I gave in.

Greg grinned. "Finally man! Will do!" He got up, and headed to the door of the tour bus, stopping at the door. "Shane?"

"What?"

"Uhh... we might have to pick up Alex on the way, so hurry up. Bye." Greg quickly said before slamming the bus's door.

Damn. Alex is coming. You might know her as her character Selena Gomez on Witches of Wiverly Place. However, she's Justin's little sister, and she hasn't really been secretive about her crush on me. She used to live with her mother in California, while Justin and his younger brother Max lived in Jersey with his mom, so she never knew me as a child. But when we had a charity event two years back, Justin introduced us, and ever since then, she's been after me. Sure, she was a nice girl, and beautiful too, but she wasn't Mitchie, you know?

* * *

Greg and I, and the rest of the band, reached the small venue, and went through the back. Thanks to my impulsiveness, we would be giving a surprise show, the fans thought they were here to watch a special screening of our tour video. It was decided earlier that Justin would separately go and get Alex, and meet with us at the club.

We were setting up the stage when Justin and Alex arrived. Justin quickly ran to the equipment to start getting ready while Alex walked over to me. I turned my head away from her, pretending to mess around with my guitar.

"Hey Shane!" Alex perkily said.

I looked up, acting surprised. "Oh! Hey Alex!" I decided that the first step towards getting over Mitchie was to be at least civil to other girls. "How are you?"

She looked caught off guard. Usually, I just ignored her. "Wow. I'm uh..fine."

I grinned. Hmm..Being nice actually felt...good. "That's great. I have to go on, but I'll see you later." With that I left, leaving Alex stunned.

Justin, Greg, and I then got into our positions, getting ready for the surprise. I heard the emcee announce that the video was about to begin, and then the curtain fell, revealing us three. The audience's reaction was comical. At first, there was silence, and then we were met with window breaking screams.

We couldn't help but grin from ear to ear, the crowds response was my new high, compared to – well, that's a different story to tell.

We went on to play the set, ending it with a new song.

"Ok guys." I yelled into the mic. "We were going to stop here, but we decided to play a new song of ours. Is that ok with y'all?" I asked the crowd.

I took their screams as a yes.

"Ok. It's called **Turn Right**."

_Pick up all your tears  
Throw 'em in your backseat  
Leave without a second glance  
Somehow I'm to blame  
For this never-ending racetrack you call life _

_So, turn right into my arms  
Turn right, you won't be alone  
You might fall off this track sometimes  
Hope to see you on the finish line_

_Driving all your friends out  
At your speed, they cannot follow  
But soon you will be on your own  
Somehow I'm to blame  
For this never-ending racetrack you call life_

_So, turn right into my arms  
Turn right, you won't be alone  
You might fall off this track sometimes  
Hope to see you on the finish line_

_I did all I could  
And I gave everything  
But you had to go your way  
And that road was not for me_

_So, turn right into my arms  
Turn right, you won't be alone  
You might fall off this track sometimes  
Hope to see you on the finish line_

After the last note played, I stood up with the rest of the band, bowed, and went backstage. I went straight to my dressing room, not really wanting to talk to anyone at the moment. Anyone who was close to me knew that the song was written about Mitchie. I didn't really think that it would have effected me in the way that it did, but I was depressed. I mean, I'm always sad, but now I'm so bummed. The last time I felt like this, I started getting into some things I shouldn't have. And as much as I knew that this was no reason to fall back into those bad habits I battled with to get rid of, I needed something really bad.

I looked around my dressing room until I found somethings that were suitable. White Out., and some spray paint that we used to make signs. They weren't really strong, but they were all I had left. I shook the bottles and opened the White Out, continuously taking huge whiffs. It took a while to settle in, but soon enough, I was on cloud nine. I couldn't really feel anything, but I still needed more. I then opened the spray paint, and sprayed it in the air, then I breathed in deeply, taking in all the fumes. I then reached into my pocket, pulling out my swiss army knife that was attached to my keychain. I pulled out the blade, and cut three short lines into my arm. _Ahh...there we go._ I now felt complete.

* * *

I sat on the couch in the dressing room for what felt like hours, but in reality was only about 20 minutes, until my door opened. Greg walked in stopping short in his tracks, before sniffing the air. I was so high, I didn't even bother to hide everything, I just lay there. He then ran up to me, fire burning in his eyes.

"Shane! What the hell man? What do you think your doing? I thought you got off of this stuff.!"

In my hazen state of mind, I just simply said. "Sorry. I couldn't help it. Mitchie doesn't love me. I hate myself." I continued to slur. For some reason, I was feeling a lot more weaker than I had ever, even when I was doing Crack and Heroine.

Greg then gasped. "Holy shit! Shane, what did you do to your self? Your arm – it's –"

I sluggishly looked down at my arm, to find it covered in blood, along with the couch. "I guess I cut in too deep huh?"

Next thing I knew, I could faintly hear Greg shouting my name in the distance, and then the world went black.

* * *

_**A/N:**_ _Ok! That was chapter two. I know that it was a bit darker than my usual work, but I decided that it would fit into my plot very nicely. As usual, I would like for you guys to leave reviews, long ones at that. What do you think is going to happen to Shane? Will he go to Nate and Mitchie's wedding? Or will he just give up...on life?_

_**Remember, many reviews equals faster updates! **_


	3. Never Let This Go

_**A/N: So..Sorry. That's all I can say about not updating. I got out of the writing mood after I saw that I only got like 4 reviews for the last chapter..:( I don't want to set a required amount of reviews until the next chapter, because that is like my pet peeve, but I just want to ask that you review. Please, I know a lot of you read this. :D**_

**Now, I'm going to reply to some reviews:**

**_razzledazzle96: _thanks for the review! But yeah, I know that it's pessimist, I worded it differently to match the vibe of the story...:D Have you heard Ignorance? That's a great song!!!!**

**_ConstantLight: _Thank you soooooo much for your review. It's the first review in a long time that made me smile! After I read your review this morning, I knew that I had to update. Thank you! I hope you like this chapter!**

**everyone else, enjoy!!!**

* * *

**_Nate's POV_**

I stalked across the street in a rage, Mitchie in hand. When we reached the other side, Mitchie yanked her hand from my grip, shaking me out of my rage. I looked at her, confusion settling in when I noticed that she seemed upset. "What?"

Her brown eyes flashed. "Nate, how could you?"

It then dawned on me what she was mad about. "Mitch, I'm sorry about being late to the wedding thing, but as you can see, I was preoccupied."

She scoffed. "Fuck the wedding right now Nate. How could you say that to her? She's your sister!"

_What? _"Mitch, she-- I don't even know her! There's no way that she is my sister! Besides, weren't you mad at her when you went there?"

"That was before I found out that she was your sister, you bastard!"

"She's the bastard, not me." I whispered.

Evidently Mitchie heard, because the next thing I knew, Mitchie's palm connected with my cheek. Shocked, I brought my hand to my face. "Nate! What happened to you? Why are acting like such a jerk? That poor girl has been searching for you for a while, and you treat her like that? You know what? I'm going to go home, and you can sit here, and think about what your going to do." With that, she stalked off.

"Mitchie!" I called after her, but it was too late, she was gone. "Shit!"

I walked to my car, and just sat in there thinking. My day was going just fine until _Shelby_ showed up. I mean, how do I know that she's really my half-sister? However, the longer I sat there, the more I started to regret my behavior towards her. I didn't even give her the chance to really explain herself, I just kinda freaked out. Great…Now I feel like the bad guy.

Turning the car on, I took one last look at the bakery, and decided that I would go there tomorrow to sort everything. I headed towards home, hoping to work things out with Mitchie when my phone rang."

"Hello?" I answered.

"Is this uh--Nate Johnson?"

"Yes? Who is this?"

"My name is Greg. I'm one of Shane's band mates, and I just wanted to tell you that he's in the hospital."

_What?!?_ "What do you mean? What is he there for?"

There was a pause of silence. "_Attempted suicide_."

_**Shane's POV**_

_Beep-Beep-Beep_

_Where am I?_ After many attempts to open my eyes, I finally succeeded, only to be met with blaring florescent lights. I once again closed my eyes, the darkness I expected replaced with recurring events that played in my mind. Opening my eyes again, I looked around the room. Hoping to see Josh, or anyone, I was only met with a nurse.

She smiled at me. "Well, it seems like you've woken up Mr. Tyler."

I cringed at that name, finally speaking up. "It's Shane." I started coughing at the dryness of my throat. The nurse offered me a cup of water.

Greedily drinking it down, I asked, "Umm…is there anyone here for me?"

She looked at me sympathetically. "Sorry honey, but you've only had three visitors during your stay, and they've gone home due to hospital policy." She must have seen my forlorn expression because she followed up with, "However, one young lady has been here for you every single day, all day."

I sighed. Of course, not a lot of people came for me. But who was this girl? " How long was I out for?"

"About a week and a half. You're a lucky man Shane, you lost a lot of blood. You should be thankful to be alive. The doctor will be right in." She smiled at me before exiting the room.

As I waited, I thought. Thought about how basically no one came to see me. I guess that was the last straw. As unfortunate as this was, it was needed, I need to get over Mitchie and move on. I'm tired of this ruling my life, I need to move on.

I looked around the room, noticing that there were some cards, chocolates, and other get well soon things scattered around the room. Grabbing a card, I looked inside to see who it from. _Nate and Mitchie?_ What? I groaned, knowing that when they came back I would be beaten down with questions. Wait… if Nate and Mitchie were two of the three people who visited me, who was the girl? I sort of expected Greg and Justin to come, but I guess they were tired of me, which hit home, pretty hard.

Grabbing a few different cards and gifts, I looked at who it was, and was shocked. _Alex?_ Alex was the mystery girl who was here for me everyday? But why? I treated her like shit most of the time, and barely acknowledged her!

Setting the things down, I continued to think until the doctor came in.

"Okay Mr. Tyler, your vital signs are good, and you've recovered smoothly. You'll be free to go soon, we just need to find a safe way for you to exit the hospital. You seem to be gossip's favorite subject at the moment." he chuckled.

Glaring at him, I asked, "Is there anyone here to take me home?"

He stopped laughing. "Um yes. We have a Miss. Alex Russo on her way to pick you up from the back."

"Ok. Thanks. You can leave now." I waved him off. What a jerky doctor.

"Before I leave Mr. Tyler, I would like to recommend a facility to you."

My anger flamed. "What kind of facility? Huh? A suicidal help clinic? A nut asylum? I'm perfectly fine! Get the hell out of my room!" I yelled at him.

He took one more frightened look at me before exiting.

How dare he? I didn't need to go to a nut house! I need to go to a ---- wedding.

--------

I was now sitting on the hospital bed, dressed and waiting on Alex. For some reason, I was filled with anticipation and nervousness. I couldn't wait to see Alex, yet I was nervous to see what she would say to me. Also, for some weird reason, I was smiling. I don't smile, at least not genuinely. I hadn't felt this way since-- Mitchie. Did that mean that I was falling for Alex? No. I pushed that thought to the back of my mind as the door opened.

Alex walked in, stopping at the door, just staring at me. (it was almost as if she expected to see me dead or something.) She then ran towards me hugged me. Shocked, I didn't really know what to do other than hug back. Wasn't she mad at me for what I did?

She pulled back, tears evident in her eyes. "Oh, Shane. I'm so happy that your ok. I didn't think that--I mean after the first week--and Greg and Justin were mad but--."

I put a finger to her mouth to stop her. "Alex. It's alright. I'm ok now, and that's all that matters."

She nodded. " I know." She took a deep breathe before going on. "Umm…everyone's back at my house, so…we should probably get going." she nervously said.

"Alright then. Let's go."

We walked through a hidden exit in the hospital, and made our way towards her house. After about 20 minutes of awkward silence, Alex said, "Umm…so, your cousin and his fiancé Mitchie are there too."

_What?_ Nate and Mitchie were there too? Great. Well, I guess that I could finally accept their wedding invitation. I then got a great idea. Turning to Alex, I took a deep breathe before asking, "Do you want to be my date to their wedding?"

-------

_**Shelby's POV**_

After the whole incident, Annabelle let me go home. I walked into my apartment, turning on the lights and locking the door behind me. Placing my purse on the sofa, I walked into my bathroom, and stared at myself in the mirror.

I couldn't believe that today I had finally found Nate! No matter how hard he denied it, I knew that he was who I've been looking for. Finding him meant that I would also find Frankie, my other half-brother. Embarrassingly enough, I cried so much when I saw him, but I couldn't help it! I thought that I wouldn't be able to see him before--well..

I pushed those negative thoughts out of my head, replacing them with positive ones. Tomorrow, I would go looking for Nate again, and this time, I would make him listen to me.

Smiling triumphantly, I opened the medicine cabinet and took out the dozens of medication I had to take twice everyday. As much as I would like to just give up some days, I know that have some things to take care of first, before I go.


	4. Hallelujah

*edit***Chapter 4 posted under A/N!!!!!!!**

I am working on an update now, but before I finish it up, I just wanted to let y'all know that I'm sorry for not updating sooner. I've just been in a rut, and usually writing helps me out, but lately, not even that helped. Luckily I've been feeling a lot better, and so I've been tweaking some things in the plot lines and some character romances. I hope you guys haven't ditched the story! :D

On a more serious note, another reason why I didn't update sooner, was because I've been getting a comment from a user, (who, by the way, deleted their profile after posting this) that really brought me down. I had a chapter written and ready to post, but after reading this, I deleted it, stupidly I may add. Even though I knew that this person was probably a loser who sits at home and says things like this to bring people down, I wasn't in the right state of mind to use sense.

Anyways, here's the comment. What do y'all think?

_**-----------------------------------------------------------------**_

_**~cryingsilver**_

_**Good God. A ** piece of ** from my ** could write better than this. How old  
are you? Five? Six?**_

_****_

What the ** is wrong with you that you think you can write a story people  
want to read? The only people that like this crack-out piece of ** are other  
inbreds like you.

Please, do the rest of humanity a favor and never, ever write anything  
again.

Just to make sure, maybe you should jump off a cliff.

_**Got it?  
Good!**_

:'(

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Holding on to patience wearing thin  
can't force these eyes to see the end  
if only time flew like a dove  
we could watch it fly and just keep looking up._

_-Hallelujah, Paramore_

**_CHAPTER 4_**

_**PREVIOUSLY:**_

_**A week earlier,**_

_We walked through a hidden exit in the hospital, and made our way towards her house. After about 20 minutes of awkward silence, Alex said, "Umm…so, your cousin and his fiancé Mitchie are there too."_

_**What? **__Nate and Mitchie were there too? Great. Well, I guess that I could finally accept their wedding invitation. I then got a great idea. Turning to Alex, I took a deep breathe before asking, "Do you want to be my date to their wedding?"_

_**Mitchie's POV**_

I laid in bed, thinking about Nate and Shelby; I was confused. I didn't understand Nate's behavior. Even though he put up a bad boy front, I knew the _real_ Nate, and he wouldn't have treated Shelby like that. Granted, slapping him probably wasn't the most rational thing to do, but I was just so angry with him.

I glanced at the clock, it was 9 o'clock. Hmm…Usually when we fought, he would be home about ten minutes later, and we'd have hot, angry sex, and then forget about it. My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. I got up, going to meet him at the door and confront him. However, I was met by an ashen Nate who looked about ready to pass out.

"Nate? What's wrong? Is it your diabetes?" I was genuinely concerned now.

His worried eyes met mine. "Mitchie. It's Shane, he's in the hospital."'

_What? Talk about random_. "For what?!"

"Attempted suicide."

_**Shane's POV**_

I took a deep breathe, waiting for Alex's reaction. She looked at me, a flicker of doubt flashing in her eyes before she grinned, giving me a hug and saying, "I would love to!"

It was then that I noticed that the car had stopped, and that we had arrived at Alex's house. "I guess we should get out now."

Alex just smiled at me and got out. Once we got to the front door, before Alex could get her key in the lock, the door was yanked open, and we were pulled in.

_**Alex's POV**_

As soon as the door opened, Shane and I were met with arms yanking us in.

Shane yelled out, "What the hell?! What kind of welcome back is this?"

Greg, who pulled us in answered, "Well, thanks to _somebody_, the paparazzi have been stalking Alex's house."

Shane then looked at me, regret marking his features. "Really? Damn, why didn't you tell me? I'm so sorry Alex."

I blushed, "It's alright. It's nothing new." I embarrassedly answered.

Suddenly, Shane's features hardened then softened, sorrow tainting his soft eyes. I followed his gaze and instantly understood. His cousin Nate and his beautiful fiancé Mitchie came out of the guest bedroom they are sharing. Shane's eyes were burning holes into Mitchie's, almost pleadingly. She then ran up to Shane, throwing herself into his arms, earning a shocked reaction from Shane.

I stood there lividly, teeth clenching. I'm pretty sure that Shane doesn't know that I know about his situation with Mitchie, but I do. Everyone thinks that I just have this little school girl crush on Shane, but it's much more than that. Only my best friend Harper knows how deep my love for Shane really is. The first time I laid eyes on him, I knew that there was something about him. Of course, it just started with physical attraction, but then it grew into something much more. He always thought of me as Justin's little sister, and no matter how hard I tried, that's all he ever thought of me as. I knew the real Shane, the insecure, sensitive Shane that he kept hidden with his arrogant cover.

That's why I was so shocked when he asked me to go to the wedding with him, and as happy as I am, I also know the real reason he asked me. He's trying to get over Mitchie, (who unfortunately has been nothing but nice to me, so I can't really hate), and he's using me. As pathetic as it sounds, I'm ok with it; it's better than nothing right?

Unable to watch their sweet reunion any longer, I excused myself. "Umm…I think I'm going to join Justin and Greg in the kitchen."

_**Shane's POV**_

As I was feeling bad for bringing the paparazzi to Alex's house, I glanced up, paling immediately. Mitchie and Nate walked out of a bedroom, both who looked worn out. Mitchie suddenly threw herself into my arms, shocking me. I looked at Nate for traces of jealousy, but instead I was met with a smile.

"Glad that your ok Shane." He said walking up to me and joining the hug.

I didn't know how to feel. Here was the girl that consumed my thoughts constantly, and she was giving me a hug along with her soon-to-be husband, _my cousin._ A part of me wanted to just tell Mitchie that I loved her, and that we were meant to be together. But surprisingly, and even_ bigger_ part of me felt nothing towards her, absolutely nothing.

We were interrupted by a small cough. Alex looked at us, and said, "Umm…I think I'm going to join Justin and Greg in the kitchen."

As she walked away, I had to stop myself from calling out to her, which was strange. Why did I want Alex to stay? I usually didn't even acknowledge her existence. Could I be falling for Alex so soon?

_**Alex's POV**_

Instead of going to the kitchen like I said I was going to, I took a detour to my bathroom. Locking the door, I shrugged out of my dress, and looked at myself in the mirror, disgusted with what I saw. No wonder Shane didn't like me as he did Mitchie! I was huge!

For the past couple of months, I had been watching what I ate, sometimes skipping many meals, just so I would catch Shane's attention. It hadn't been working until recently, and then Mitchie just _had _to come. I had been avoiding suspicious questions from Justin about my weight, he just didn't understand. He was my brother, so he had to tell me that I looked great, but Shane wouldn't want a fat girlfriend. My thoughts may seem irrational for a usually rational girl, but with Shane, nothing really made sense.

Taking one last glance in the mirror, I put my dress back on, already plotting how I was going to avoid eating at dinner that was planned for tonight. If this is all I had to do to get Shane to love me, then I was ready to do all it took.

_------------_

_**a/n: Sorry about the shortness! :( This chapter was a bit darker and introduced some more sub-plot ideas, which I hoped you liked. please review! The next chapter is the dinner scene! **_

_**O.O**_


	5. Ignorance

A/n: at the end of chapter....

_You treat me just like another stranger It's nice to meet you sir I guess i'll go I best be on my way out. Ignorance is your new best friend Ignorance is your new best friend_

_-Ignorance-Paramore_

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**_Shelby's POV:_**

I walked into the bakery, about a week and a half after my confrontation with Nate. I had tried to get in touch with him many times, only to find out that he and Mitchie had gone to see his--I mean _our_ cousin. Nobody would tell me why, but I had a feeling it wasn't good.

This was actually my first day back at work since then, I had been too week to even get out of bed. I had to call Dr. House to come over to deliver my care. My prognosis isn't looking any better, if not worse. In fact, I'm probably not even supposed to be out of bed, but if I come here, then it would be easier for Nate to find me. Plus, I want to live my life as normally as I can.

_**Mitchie's POV**_

Nate and I have been staying at Alex's house for a little over 2 weeks, waiting for Shane to wake up. Nate was devastated, as was I, but I think that it hit Nate more. He was so depressed, and he wouldn't hardly talk to anyone. I had to hide my feelings to stay strong for Nate, but when Shane walked through the door earlier today, I couldn't help but break down the shield I put on. Nate soon followed, both of us embracing someone important to us.

As we started to ask Shane questions, Alex mad herself known, saying that she was going into the kitchen. Now that I think about it, Alex was nothing but nice to us, but I couldn't help but feel some hostility directed towards me.

For the first time since Shane came, he finally showed some emotion, looking startled at her. _Hmm…I wonder if there was anything going on between them. _

Justin then walked in telling us, "Umm…Sorry to interrupt, but the reservations are in about and hour and a half. Soo…"

Shane looked at us, eyes flashing. "What reservations?"

Justin glared back. "We're all going to Katsuya for dinner. Do you have a problem with that? Do we need to cancel all for you?"

I spoke up, wanting to avoid confrontation between the tense band mates, "Shane, we all just want to sit down and talk."

Nate joined, "Yeah man, I haven't seen you in forever. And we can talk about…"

Shane turned to him, "Talk about what?! Huh? I'm not stupid. I know you guys just want me somewhere public so that I can't get mad while you bash me. Hell to the fucking no! I'm not going!" He yelled, shocking us all.

Then Alex walked in, "Woah! Shane, I could hear you from my room! We just wanted to go to dinner to celebrate you coming home. I planned it…" She trailed off.

Suddenly Shane's whole demeanor changed. "You planned it? But..why??"

She sighed inching loser to him until they were inches apart. "I told you, I wanted to celebrate your coming home." She trailed off again, sadness present in her eyes. "But..if you don't want us to go, then I could canc--"

Shane cut her off. "No!" He shouted, his face flushing with embarrasment. "I mean-- that's ok. You already went through so much trouble to get the reservations, so…"

Alex just smiled, saying "Ok then! Let's all get dressed! Wear something nice!" before skipping off to her room.

We all just stared at Shane before he looked at us, shrugging and walking off to his room. "What? Gosh."

We all looked at each other thinking the same thing. Shane was whooped. I didn't even know that he liked Alex, and I'm pretty sure that he didn't even know himself.

Well at least he was getting over me, which was good….right?

Shane's POV

I closed the door to my room and started to get ready, while thinking about what just happened.

All I know is that one minute, I was furious at everyone, and the next minute, Alex came, and I just gave in. What was going on? Surely after only one day I couldn't have developed feelings for Alex, right? But…Ever since I found out that Alex had been the only one that visited me every day, (aside from Nate and Mitchie), I had been feeling differently about Alex. I felt like I needed her, and that she would be the only one who would understand me. And speaking of Mitchie, when she hugged me, I expected to feel…something; but I didn't. Nothing, not a spark, no fireworks. I remember wanting to tell Mitchie that I loved her during our embrace, but now that I look at the situation, I didn't love her. I didn't know if that was a good thing or not. Was I over Mitchie?

_**At dinner,,,,,**_

_**Shane's POV**_

We were now at Katsuya, in the VIP section, waiting on our order. The table arrangement was a bit strange. It was a rectangular table with Greg and I on the ends. Mitchie was seated on my left, Alex on my right. Nate was seated next to Mitchie, and Justin was next to Alex.

Everyone was engaged in some mindless chatter with each other, the table setting a bit tense. Alex and I on the other hand, were actually enjoying ourselves. I couldn't help but stare at Alex, she looked beautiful in this blue dress that complimented her nicely. I guess I was staring a little too hard because Alex looked at me, confused.

"Do I have something on my face?" She asked, embarrassed.

"No." I blushed. "You just look really…nice." _Nice? Wow Shane…smooth. Dumbass._

She laughed. "Nice? Gee, thanks Shane."

"Well, you know, I have a way with words. The ladies can't resist me." I joked.

"Sure…." we both laughed.

We were interrupted by Justin glaring at us, "If you two would stop flirting, you would have noticed that our food is here."

Alex blushed, "Shut up Justin."

I just ignored him, and started to eat, glancing around the table for what seemed like the first time. Greg seemed to be in his own little world, texting someone on his Blackberry. When Greg wasn't glaring at me, which was annoying, he was watching Alex eat, who was glaring back at Greg. The strange part was Nate and Mitchie. From what I remember, they always used to flirt and bicker when together, but tonight, they were silent. Nate looked depressed and was pushing his food around, sighing every couple of seconds; it was a sad sight. Mitchie, on the other hand, was glancing worriedly at Nate every couple of seconds, but was glaring at Alex for the most part. Did something happen between them while I was…gone?

Anyways, I decided that it was time to tell Mitchie and Nate about the wedding.

I looked to them, interrupting them both from their previous actions. "Hey, umm…so I know that your wedding is in a month, and that I avoided talking to you guys until now. I just wanted to say I'm sorry." By this time, I had the whole table's attention. I glanced at Alex. "So Nate, I just wanted to tell you that I would be honored to be your best man, and that I would be going with Alex."

The table was silent, and I was getting nervous waiting for a reaction when Nate smiled and said. "Thanks man, you don't know how much that means to me."

I smiled back, knowing that everything between us was under the bridge. I looked around the table, and everyone's expressions matched his; except for Justin, who was still glaring at me. And…Mitchie??

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Sorry for the shortness!!33

and....*sigh*

I really need reviews, and people subscribe and favorite, but they don't review. :((((

so...I won't post another chapter until I get a few reviews. =]

I know it sounds mean, but....you gave me no choice.

lol

bye=]


	6. All I Wanted

_**A/N at the end.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Camp Rock characters, All I Wanted by Paramore; or Fireflies by Owl City. (Which I love!)**_

"_Think of me when you're out, when you're out there  
I'll beg you nice from my knees  
And when the world treats you way to fairly  
Well it's a shame it's a dream_

All I wanted was you  
All I wanted was you"

_-All I Wanted; Paramore_

_------_

_**Shane's POV**_

We were now all lounging around Alex's house, readying ourselves for bed after staying up all night. The rest of the night went off without a hitch, the mood even lifted. However, Justin continued to glare at me throughout the whole thing, which I decided was due to whatever he thought was going on with Alex and I. _Which I myself was still a bit confused on._ But every once in a while I would catch Mitchie making snide remarks and shooting daggers at Alex, who was seemingly oblivious to it, acting cordial all the same. Every time I would give her a questioning look she would just blush and avoid my gaze. _She couldn't possibly be jealous, right?_

Brushing that thought out of my head for the time being, I walked upstairs to the bedroom I would be staying in. Grabbing my toothbrush I walked down the dark hallway towards the bathroom, my journey interrupted when I collided with a very— _wet_ person. I got up and peered down to see Alex, my breath catching, gasping at the sight before me. She was clad only in a small towel, her hair falling down in thick, beautiful ringlets, a thick blush heating up her cheeks. _She looked—beautiful._

"Uh… Shane? Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to help me up?" she chuckled.

Snapping myself out of the trance I was in, I helped her up, trying to hide my own blush. "Sorry!"

She looked at me, inches apart, and breathed, "It's alright."

We stood there for what seemed like forever, taking each other in, so close our noses touched. So close that I couldn't help but notice how lush her lips looked, aching to taste her. Just as I was going to lean in, the hallway light turned on, and we jumped apart, breathing heavily.

Justin came round the corner, halting when he saw us, eyes narrowing. "Alex! Why are you in a towel, with _Shane_!?"

If possible, she just blushed even harder. "Justin! Stop being ridiculous! We just ran into each other. Besides, it's none of your business what I do, and with whom!" With that she ran into her room, leaving me to face Justin's bitchy attitude. _Thanks Alex._ I thought sarcastically. _I'll have to thank you for that later._

Justin then looked at me, glaring. He came up to me, pointing at my chest. "Listen up Shane. I know that we're best friends and all, but stay away from Alex. No offense, but your pretty screwed up, and that's the last thing Alex needs right now, she has her own problems."

My anger flared. How dare he say that? "No, you listen up. I appreciate that your trying to look out for your little sister and everything, but don't bring _my _problems into this. You have _no_ idea of what I've been through. When you were in a serious funk over Gretchen, I helped you get back on your feet. Where were you when I was _dying_ in the hospital?!" I yelled, not caring that everyone in the house could probably hear me.

Justin's eyes widened; guilt and shock replacing anger. "Listen man, I'm sorr—"

I cut him off, not wanting to hear any excuses. "Cut the bullshit! I'm so fucking tired of your 'woe be me' attitude! You and Greg weren't even there for me when I needed you! Even when I came home, I didn't get a welcome! _Alex_ on the other hand, came every fucking day! So do I'll do you a favor and stay out of your life while you stay out of mine, but I'm not going to let go of Alex. If it wasn't for her I probably would have done it again, except I would have cut deep enough to end it all. Fuck you!" With that I walked pass him, and Alex, who had come out of her room by then, and slammed my door shut; hands shaking.

I knew what I needed at that moment, a fix. Even though I told myself over and over that it wasn't right, I went searching for something, anything; the shaking reaching the point of being unbearable. Unable to find anything, not even a blade, I just lay on my bed, miserably scratching at my skin, the pain, the cold, it was too much. I was going through a bout of withdrawal by myself for what seemed like hours, praying for sleep to appear and end my pain. When it did, the last thing I remembered was a dark haired angel holding me, ridding me of my pain.

_**Mitchie's POV**_

I don't even know what's wrong with me. I know I love Nate; with every fiber in my being, I know that he's the one. But for some reason, all throughout dinner I couldn't help but feel surges of jealousy when watching Shane and Alex. It was obvious that the two were attracted to each other; their chemistry was so thick I could cut it with a knife. However, I couldn't shake the feelings of longing and resentment that consumed me when thinking about the two. I barely even knew Alex, but whenever she leaned in towards Shane I wanted to strangle her. I knew for a fact that I was over Shane, so why did I feel this way? Maybe I'm trying to protect him. _Yeah, I think I'll go with that. _

Nate and I were now lying in bed, discussing what we had managed to avoid: Shelby.

"I really think that you should talk to Shelby when we get back. She's obviously not after your money, so what she wanted to tell you was probably important."

Nate sighed in annoyance. "Mitchie, do we really have to talk about this now?"

My temper flared. "What the hell do you mean?! Yes! We _will_ talk about this now. I'm tired of this attitude you've been using with me!" I yelled, my voice thick with emotion and tears. "Please."

Nate looked at me, harsh eyes softening instantly. "I'm sorry Mitch. I'll talk to her when we get back." He hung his head shamefully, looking back at me with teary eyes. "I just— Please go with me. I don't think I could do it alone."

I looked at him, shocked. Nate never showed vulnerability to me. I smiled, my love for him fully consuming me, validated. "Of course. I love you."

He smiled at me and we embraced, tranquility finally taking over our lives when we heard shouting from upstairs. We looked at each other, wariness present in both of our gazes and walked out into the hall where we saw Greg. His eyes were wide and full of guilt, hurt, and tears. Listening to that was going on upstairs we all gasped at what was said.

_If it wasn't for her I probably would have done it again, except I would have cut deep enough to end it all. Fuck you!_

I gasped, my hand covering my mouth in shock. What exactly happened with Shane?

_**Alex's POV**_

I quietly walked to Shane's room a few hours after the big blowout. I couldn't believe that Shane was that far in, he was obviously harboring feelings of resentment against almost everyone but me. As selfish as this may sound, I'm a little happy at that. Maybe he's finally returning some of the feelings that I have towards him.

I opened his door, stunned to see him shivering uncontrollably, sweating and muttering to himself. He looked like he was on the verge of death. Tears welling up in my eyes, I was just about to go call for help when I remembered what the doctor had told me. Shane was having withdrawals, since he was in a coma his body was not able to go through them yet. I just climbed into bed with him, holding onto his cold body and sang to him. Soon enough he stopped moving and his breathing evened out as sleep possessed his body, bringing the peace I knew he yearned for. I stayed with him all night, humming the tune I sang earlier.

"You would not believe your eyes,  
If ten million fireflies.  
Lit up the world as I fell asleep.  
'Cause they fill the open air,  
And leave teardrops everywhere"

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-_- _**So I'm guessing that y'all probably hate me right now and I just wanted to say, SORRY!!!!! Usually, I have a lame excuse that involves laziness, but this time, I have a good one: school. I'm a junior in all AP classes, and in a healthcare program, plus after-school clubs! School's seriously kicking my ass! Usually writing helps me unwind, but I haven't even had time for that! So once again, sorry! At least this chapter's a bit longer than usual, right? *P.S.; I know that this chapter isn't much consolidation, but bear with me, I promise that good stuff is on the way.*P.P.S; For those of you that haven't heard Paramore's new album, go listen to it! It's pretty B.A =]**_


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